my secret

so i know a lot of stuff. the thing is, i have been holding back for a long time now in the talking department. i am not really sure why, but it seemed like the thing to do. i talked a little bit a long time ago, and i even said my first word almost a year ago. (it was "good," and i was talking about my food, of course.) then i just kind of stopped, except for the occasional "Mama!" and "Daddeeee," used kind of non-specifically, and usually when i want something or am hurt. i used to repeat words and sounds that mom or dad tried to get me to say, but i felt that that was kind of cheating, because it was not really in context or my idea. but now, there are words and things that i really want to say. i do not know how many times i have almost let my secret slip and just started blurting out sentences. i am afraid that my mom and dad could not handle this, so i have to do it a little at a time. i would not want mom to pass out or anything, and judging by her reaction to the tricks i have been pulling out the past few days, that is definitely a valid concern.

the first one was actually an accident. we are sitting in McDonalds the other day, and i drop my french fry. before i know it is coming out, i hear myself say, "Uh oh!" and then i look up, and mom's eyes are open wide, and she is asking dad if he heard me. he says he did. for a minute i do not know whether to deny it or just go with it, but i eventually decide to go with it. "Uh oh!" i guess that is an appropriate way to start things off. no turning back now!

the next day, mom comes home with this little bag of beads that look very much like the ball in The Cat in the Hat. the one with the stripe and the star. anyway, i notice the similarity, and i point to the beads and say, "ball!" mom, of course, freaks out. "oh my gosh, jeff! did you hear that?" (jeff is my dad) "he said ball, because these look like the ball in his book!" well, at least she understands what i am talking about. but i need to take a few days off. this excitement can not be good for her.

this morning, i really really want mom to wake up, so i decide to pull out another trick. "E!"....... "Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" Mom wakes up and sees me pointing to an E on her shirt, and says, "Yes! that is right! E!" now i have known lots of my letters for a good couple months now and have been pointing them out on command. i just had not told anyone i know how to say them too. i pick up my book, One Fish Two Fish Red Fish Blue Fish, by Dr. Seuss, and before i can stop myself, i find myself pointing to the O and saying "Oooooo!" then i do "D" and "R," although "r" is sort of hard to say, and i can only really say "ah." we will work on that. but i thought that was enough for today.

mom seems to be doing okay. her color is back to normal.

The Merriest Go-Round and other fun things

so, a week or a few days ago, we go to the Arkansas/Oklahoma State Fair! i think they were confused about which state to have the fair in, so they just decided to make it both. i am not really sure, but that is beside the point. we ride rides, including the merry-go-round (twice!) and the train, and this crazy, convulsing horse. i like the horse at first, but then it gets carried away, and i leave. it is the best time ever. dad says this is excellent practice for disney world!

confession

so, when i get my hands on a sharpie, i can not control myself. i try! (a little)... but the marks they make are so bold and good... and all that stuff i see, is so bare... okay, well i guess i better tell the story. okay, stories.

so the other day we are at aunt margie's house. i play with the pool table for a while, then i almost pet the dog, but he is a little too scary. and then i turn the light on and off. and then i see the hallway and remember there are rooms down there for me to go look around in. i take a quick glance around, and nobody seems to mind much, so i head down the hall into margie and joe's room. there is lots of interesting stuff. and then, there on the desk, i spy it. a sharpie! this room, i decide, needs some decoration. you know the rest. i hear people heading down the hallway saying "where is sam?" at this point i realize maybe i should have thought this through a bit more. i make one last mark on the carpet, when margie comes in and her eyes get real wide. mom comes in right behind her. margie takes away the marker, and they look around a little. before long they discover all the marks. the dresser... the other dresser... a little on the floor and one mark on the wall... and the remote control... mom looks in my eyes and tells me that i am never, ever to draw on things with markers. i nod to show her that i understand. it is hard to look at mom when she talks to me like that, because it takes the fun right out of everything. mom tells margie she is really sorry, and margie says it is okay. mom's face is all red.

so that was kind of a big deal but not too bad. i tell myself i am done with sharpies, though, because i do not think mom was very happy about that whole incident.

the next morning, i wake up, and mom and dad are still asleep, so i decide to read a little bit. then i see it on top of the shelf. another sharpie. i look away, trying to focus on reading again. my eyes keep being drawn back to the marker, and before i even know what is happening, i am making a really detailed picture on the wall. i realize how much i have actually drawn and take the marker off. oh no! mom and dad told me i am only to ever draw on paper! i find a piece of paper and draw on it. the paper is too small. oh, but then i see my cat in the hat book! these books are made of paper, so surely they are okay to draw on. so i draw on another and another and another... then the marker slips off the book and starts to draw on the carpet. the mark on the carpet does not look quite right, so i try to make it look a little better. then i wonder if you can see the black marks on a black chair and decide to experiment a bit. (you can, by the way; it looks shiny) then i draw a little bit on the bed and the pillows. mom does not let me finish the design i start on her forehead, before she wakes up...